More Russian with a Stove Test and Steaks

Greetings Me Droogs N Droogettes!
Ran a couple of tests today around Ye Olde Casa El Grande Campesino, specifically MOR food tests.  Now, as all have been tuned in, the Russian MREs are by far the best combat grub I’ve found in a looong time of eating foreign MREs.  The Polish ones come in somewhere in the same arena, just that it depends on the menu.  The coolest thing though about the rooskie stuff is the little stove thingy and fuel they include.

Most of the modern MREs use the stinky use-this-much-water Flameless heater.  Lots of times, they tend to be heatless too, depending on environment and age.  The older US MRE heaters are notorious for just sucking period.  I have -no idea- why they made it (the heater bag/element) just big enough for the food envelope to fit inside, on it’s own.  Whereas every. other. country. provides a big ole heater/bag combo so’s you can heat up your meal, all at once and get your chow hot, all at the same time, nice and hot.  The US DotMil, with bids fromt he lowest bidder?  Not so fuckin’ mucho Aye?

So, the Russians, they seem to be using a lot of commercial grade actual chow, as seen here, and with the lil stove and match pack along side it:

As oyu can see, it’s Kasha, which is a ground meat and rice goulash.  Looks good in the picture huh?  The matches are strike anywhere BUT it includes a strike paper as the matches have like this thick waterproof coating over them, which makes them fat at the top.  When I busted open the stove, there was a small metal (aluminum) plate with a lot of cuts in it.  4 of them got to the bottom to form the base, and the bigger triangular ones fold up, but not all the way, to form the ‘holder’ for the chow itself.  the fuel pellet sits in the middle:

Close Up:

Note:  The fuel I -think- is trioxane.  The pellets stink… like gross stinky smell.  Also, because it’s a flame, you can’t cook any of the packet style MREs on this.  The rooskie food comes in aluminum tins, that need to have the corner peeled up so it doesn’t pop and blow up.  The fuel lit pretty well, after holding the flame on it for a bit.  It too was coated with a waterproofing wax or something that once it (the fuel) started, the wax became a non-issue

As I said, it lit up really well…no issues.  the trick that I had was making sure the 4 ‘holding’ arms were even so’s the food was balanced nicely.  Once I was sure it wasn’t going to blow out, I put the chow on it and let it go for about 5-6 minutes

I let it cook until steam was pouring out of the peeled back tab.  Then, once that was done, I pulled the Kasha, and threw the can of rooskie spam on that was left over from the last MRE.  Wasn’t sure how hungry I was, so what the hell.  Now, once it was all done (both meals) This is what was still left going on the stove:

About 1/2 sized from the original size when I first lit it.  Very efficient combustion I’d say.The chow itself?  The usual good tasting stuff.  Haven’t had -anything- negative to speak of so far, and that is unusual for -any- military food, nevermind from a country thats military theoretically is backwards and less than ours.

I wonder how the field grunts would react to try a Russian MRE for an entire field problem?

Probably cause a mutiny in the ranks LOL.

The -other- test was the bag o’sirloin steaks from that freeze dried company.  I’d had a couple of them in the past, but not from the ‘big bag o’steaks’.  They, of course were excellent, however I forgot to take pics.  I will next time as I intentionally have left overs that I want to leave in the bag for a few days, maybe a week, week and a half, then rehydrate and cook them after they’ve been sitting around in the bag after being exposed so to speak.  Be a god test on those for the longevity AFTER being initially uncrated and used.  I sealed them, with the original O2 desiccant, ziplocked in the original bag.  Said that they’ll keep for 3-4 weeks, unrefrigerated as long as you keep them dry and un-rehydrated.

I’ll take pics when I rehydrate them.  As I said, this batch was OMG good BUT:

Key observational note.  In a ‘true TEOTWAWKI’ situation, cooking these things is going to be able to be smelled from a quarter mile away.  I only did 10 seconds on high heat, each side (they’re very thin) so as to get them medium well… anything longer and they’ll be minute steaks.  That being said, they were super tender and no gristle.  VERY good steaks, BUT you’re going to attract every. starvin. marvin. within a full gridsquare if you start cooking these up.  My across the street neighbor came over to borrow a baking pan and said she could smell them all the way across the street.

OPSEC: Smell.  That’s a issue.  Keep it in mind Aye?

Starvation makes people into dangerous people.
THIS more than anything is why worry.
So, More Later I Remain The Intrepid Reporter
Big Country

By BigCountryExpat

Fuck you if you can't take a joke. No one gets out alive so eat me.


  1. Slow cooker I have noticed is a fairly low smell cooking unless a spicy dish. Far lower than pan frying meats. For low smoke wood cooking a rocket stove and a strawbox retained heat cooker is thrifty with firewood.

  2. Haven’t seen that brand before. I have some vac sealed in cans in my preps. Good point about the odor carrying a ways. Starving people are going to be extremely desperate people.

  3. You are supposed to keep the tins shut as you cook them. It locks in the flavor.

    Trust me.

  4. The distance that cooking smells can travel seem to be one of those areas where no two opinions match. I’ve read of hungry people being able to smell food cooking at everything from “at least 1/4 mile” to “up to 1 mile” and about everything in between. The claim of 1 mile seems highly dubious; then again I’ve never not eaten for a week and then taken a walk a mile downwind from a pig roast. In any event, my local topography & usual wind patterns will prevent me from using either of my grills after day 2-3 of a SHTF situation, possibly earlier depending on the flavor of the event.

    Another thing to keep in mind when pondering this subject is pregnant women/mothers & their heightened sense of smell. If you live in or adjacent to a diversity* rich area with a high birth rate you may find it impossible to cook, lest you bring down the local Dindu population down on you for some gibs. We’re already seeing a federal push to rewrite zoning laws & put “low income housing” literally everywhere, which means the ghetto problems won’t be confined to the ghetto much longer. pResident Kidsniffer is about to bring the ghetto to all of us regardless of where we are. And let’s be honest, once the low rent stuff gets built & occupied, where do you think the Dindu Nuffins will congregate? Where do you think they’ll go once things really start to fall apart, the ‘hood or the ‘burbs?

    * also applies to local tweaker house, heroin encampment, & (due to high concentration of pregnant women) military housing.

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